Stuart Monroe
SummerSlam 2003 originally Aired on August 24th, 2003 from the America West Arena in Phoenix, Arizona
It’s the summer of 2003, and the Ruthless Aggression Era in WWE (recently renamed following the lengthy lawsuit from the World Wildlife Federation) is starting to hit its stride. The World Heavyweight Championship (aka “the big gold belt”) was revived for the Raw brand in September of the previous year, with Triple H holding it for the duration of that time. Your Olympic hero, Kurt Angle, is the WWE Champion over on SmackDown. The remaining rosters of WCW and ECW were absorbed into both shows, leading to a bevvy of top-level talent and intriguing matchups. It was a hell of a time to be a wrestling fan.
I was not yet a father (though I’m 99 per cent certain that my daughter was conceived on this trip), and my wife and I were holding tickets to WWE’s second-biggest event of the year. It was a scant six and a half hours from Albuquerque to Phoenix, and along with my best friend we hit the road to take in what WWE often referred to as “the biggest party of the summer”. The way we partied back then, that turned out to be an understatement.
Outside, it was 105 degrees (side note: not a fun line to wait in), but inside we were to behold one of the better SummerSlam shows of any era in WWE history. Without any further ado (or any more of my strolling down memory lane), let’s jump into this killer card.
Lilian Garcia opens the show with a stirring rendition of the National Anthem, and there ain’t much in the world better than that, both from a presentation and vocal standpoint. I miss Lilian Garcia. The opening promo video package is of the “end times” variety, an often-used schtick in those days. We go back out to the ring, and it’s time for the first match of the evening.
WWE Tag Team Champions La Résistance vs. The Dudley Boyz
Ah, La Résistance…remember those silly Frenchmen? That means that in addition to being a tag team championship match, this is also the ‘patriotism versus foreign heathens’ match of the show. “USA! USA! USA!”
The match starts outside the ring, and it’s physical right out the gate with a hot crowd. It’s all Dudley Boyz in the early going, with D’Von putting out some crisp chain wrestling before tagging in Bubba Ray, who’s all clubbing forearms and wanton violence. Bubba even breaks out a Tree of Woe nut stand that I feel should be more commonplace today, but I digress.
La Résistance takes over after a cheap shot, inciting the crowd all the while and getting some nuclear heat. They are no match for the Dudleys, however, until the cameraman runs into the ring (while the ref is distracted, of course) and nails Bubba with the camera! The cameraman is none other than the fake US serviceman from the previous Monday Night Raw, who would eventually become the third member of La Résistance, Rob Conway. That’s all she wrote for the Dudley Boyz in this stolen match.
Winners via pinfall and STILL WWE Tag Team Champions: La Résistance
We go backstage to find Eric Bischoff (in his martial arts gear), shadowboxing and preparing for his match later with Shane McMahon. He’s approached by WWE Intercontinental Champion Christian. He’s incensed that he’s been left off the card for SummerSlam 2003, but Bischoff doesn’t have time for it until Christian starts asking him what happened after Bischoff snuck into the bedroom of Linda McMahon the previous week! It’s a less-than-PG moment that’s followed by Christian offering his services should Bischoff need a hand. Bischoff says he has it all under control
Undertaker vs. A-Train (w/Sable)
Okay, first off: Undertaker’s “You’re Gonna Pay” theme music is one of the great underrated bangers of all time in WWE. Taker is working this match with the dreaded taped ribs after previous beatdowns from the massive A-Train (formerly Albert). He sells it like the pro that he is, working the match at an even slower and more methodical pace than your usual Undertaker match. He makes A-Train (an underrated wrestler in his own right) look like a million bucks; you don’t see too many guys throw multiple vertical suplexes on the Deadman! There’s also a ludicrously stiff exchange of punches that goes on for a solid minute.
Referee Hebner eats a butt-nasty clothesline (accidental, of course) from the Undertaker and spends some time staring up at the lights, before coming to in enough time for a pair of false finishes. Taker then seals the deal with a particularly hefty chokeslam for the 3-count.
Afterwards, SmackDown GM Stephanie McMahon makes her triumphant return for revenge on the wicked Sable with Taker’s help; the crowd pops huge for it. It also comes complete with a wardrobe malfunction for Sable that you wouldn’t properly see unless you were there (be jealous, folks).
Winner via pinfall: Undertaker
Backstage again, we see Y2J pacing in preparation for the Elimination Chamber main event for the World Heavyweight Championship. That’s followed by Jonathan Coachman interviewing some fans at ringside who are simply a bunch of Goldberg marks. Ugh.
Raw GM Eric Bischoff vs. Shane McMahon
This match has a particularly awesome video package that reminds you that no one does video packages like WWE. This is the show’s ultimate grudge match. ‘Big Match’ Shane O’ Mac wears out Bischoff for a solid five minutes with peppery punches and kicks, tossing him around like a rag doll, before a surprise attack from ringside correspondent Jonathan “Coach” Coachman with a steel chair! Bischoff changes the rules on the fly—this is now a Falls Count Anywhere match! Coach keeps a running commentary (as J.R. and King’s mics have been killed) while Bischoff lays the smack down; this is classic Ruthless Aggression-era stuff here. It’s all heels until the glass breaks and Stone Cold Steve Austin shows up. Austin annihilates both Coach and Bischoff after they “physically provoke” him, leading to the vintage Shane O’ Mac flying elbow from the ringpost to the announce table outside. Linda’s honor has been restored.
Winner via pinfall at ringside: Shane McMahon
Back in the Evolution locker room, Ric Flair is coaching young Randy Orton on his role in the Elimination Chamber match. Orton says, “Yeah, but what if…” before Triple H walks up and also reminds Randy of his job inside the chamber.
Fatal 4-Way: United States Champion “Latino Heat” Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit vs. Tajiri vs. Rhyno
Watching this one back on WWE Network, there are some conflicting emotions seeing Eddie Guerrero and Chris Benoit share the ring; half of the match participants are dead, with one revered and one disgraced. It’s a bit sobering.
Nonetheless, it’s a deeply physical back and forth with everyone throwing the lumber. Early on, Eddie ducks in and out of the ring, playing defense and then sneaking back out. Everyone is getting in their best stuff, and the pace is breakneck. There’s a stellar double submission spot with Guerrero and Benoit, and Rhyno dishes out some spinebusters that are the best you’ll see this side of Arn Anderson.
In classic Fatal 4-Way fashion, it’s a finisher fest with a slew of pin breakups until finally, Eddie Guerrero manages to sneak in a frog splash for the win. It’s the show stealer of the night, a match with numerous high spots, grounded physicality, and no letup from four old ECW alums who know each other like the proverbial backs of their hands.
Winner via pinfall and STILL United States Champion: “Latino Heat” Eddie Guerrero
WWE Champion Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar
It’s a match of mutual respect and Vince McMahon’s involvement, so you know it’s going to be intense. Brock shows his power early out of the lockup, tossing Kurt a few times before Angle settles into his mat wrestling groove with quick switches and go behinds into nasty throws. Brock gets frustrated, however, and it becomes a more conventional brawl. Lesnar tossing Angle directly to the floor outside from a gorilla press is a nasty spot! Brock’s style at this time (in his pre-UFC days) was much more that of a traditional pro wrestling powerhouse.
Brock controls the pace during the mid-stretch of the match. Kurt finally catches a break when Brock hits the ring post good and hard; even Brock’s sudden F5 is countered by a beautifully fluid DDT. Angle finally gets that ankle lock, but the ref gets taken out again and here comes Vince with a chair. It’s all for nought, though, as Angle keeps Brock in the ankle lock for an absurdly long time before he finally, dramatically, taps (you can count the number of times Brock Lesnar has tapped in twenty-plus years on one hand). The crowd explodes for the pop of the night. Vince tries to involve himself further and ends up taking an Angle Slam into a chair for his trouble.
Winner via submission and STILL WWE Champion: Kurt Angle
Backstage, Goldberg preps by snorting and acting all intense. Big shocker. Back out at Ringside, we see many members of the Arizona Diamondbacks (a big improvement over Goldberg).
No Holds Barred Match: Rob Van Dam vs. Kane
In the show’s other grudge match (which is also a classic contrast of styles match), it’s the most athletic and unorthodox wrestler of the day against the ultimate monster. Kane had recently unmasked, and RVD was suffering for it week after week. This match also features some extra crispy commentary as this was right after Kane set fire to J.R. during an interview (see what I did there?)
The early going finds Kane eating a ton of well-placed kicks from the educated feet of RVD and no-selling the hell out of them. The ladder and the stairs both come into play early and often, and most of the match takes place at ringside with a small slew of “Holy shit!” moments (RVD’s fall from the top rope into the sideways stairs on the floor is truly awful).
RVD gets in all his best stuff—Rolling Thunder with a chair, Van Terminator, and an errant Coast to Coast. It’s the missed Coast to Coast that costs him as Kane ends up giving him the Tombstone Piledriver on top of the stairs. Kane looked unbelievably dominant in this match, and it ended the feud between him and RVD.
Winner via pinfall: Kane
We’re backstage again, and Eric Bischoff is in the trainer’s room being tended to after the ass-whipping he took. Linda McMahon comes in and adds insult to injury by slapping the piss out of him! Cut to Triple H sitting and staring at his title in a big old puddle of worry. Ric Flair walks in and reminds him just who the hell he is. He tells him that he’s not saying goodbye to his title; he’s just taking it out and showing it to them for a while. It’s a great moment between those two that gives you a chill.
Elimination Chamber Match: World Heavyweight Champion Triple H vs. “HBK” Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho vs. Randy Orton vs. “Big Daddy Cool” Kevin Nash vs. Goldberg
Orton, Nash, Triple H, and Goldberg are out first and locked into pods; The Heartbreak Kid and Y2J will start this one off.
The two GOATs do their thing as only they can for the first five minutes; their chemistry was unparalleled. Orton is out of his pod first, and he is on fire. Michaels gets a bit of a break as Orton and Jericho wear each other out on that famously unforgiving steel grating outside the ring. Kevin Nash is in next, and he owns the ring for the next couple of minutes until he eats a Sweet Chin Music and Jericho cleans up the pin. This leads to another Sweet Chin Music for Triple H and a gigantic temper tantrum from Big Daddy Cool where everyone not in a pod gets to eat a Jackknife Powerbomb or two before he begrudgingly leaves.
A now-bloody HBK is up first following the slaughter, and the three men go back and forth with each other until Goldberg’s pod opens up. You know what comes next, right? It’s so predictable: a quick spear and a pin on the future 14-time World Champion Randy Orton…spear on Jericho through the pod door…Jackhammer on HBK for another pin…Jackhammer on Jericho for the pin. Now Triple H cowers in his pod, and it’s finally down to just the two men. T
They finally go at it both inside and outside the pod, with (you guessed it) Goldberg dominating completely. The spear is set up, but don’t look now—Triple H has a sledgehammer tossed to him through the chains by Ric Flair! One headshot delivered mid-spear and the champion has retained his title. All is right with the world! Follow that up with a 3-man beatdown to a bloody and handcuffed Goldberg by Evolution. At least the right guy won this time (Triple H would later lose the title to Goldberg at the next PPV).
Winner and STILL World Heavyweight Champion: Triple H
Final Thoughts
SummerSlam 2003 was a story-heavy PPV (as they all tended to be during that time) that nonetheless produced a total classic between Kurt Angle and Brock Lesnar, a wildly old-school Falls Count Anywhere brawl between two part-time wrestlers, and one of the more criminally underrated Fatal 4-Ways you’re likely to ever see. All champions retained. The show flowed well between backstage segments and in-ring action. The video packages for each match were (as always) stellar.
While it was still edgy, you could start to see the first hints of the shift away from the R-rated insanity of the Attitude Era into something slightly more family-friendly. Being in the crowd that night, I can tell you that Goldberg fever was still high, and the fans didn’t exactly go home happy (though my posse certainly did). I’d also like to take a minute to say “Shame on WWE!” for editing out Goldberg busting his ass during his ring entrance while kicking the air like a tough guy!
Like I said, though…the right guy won to finish the night. Thank you, WWE.
